Never... EVER... Challenge Your Mother.

In issuing a blind challenge to the blogosphere (and this blog's small-but-strangely-devoted readership), I was a fool to ignore a mother's love. My mother is wonderful at two things: loving everything her children do and saving only our most humiliating pictures. Even though I think I was a mistake, I'm not immune to her love. As a Just Above Kansas reader, she jumped at the opportunity to meet my challenge. The result, for me, is an uncomfortable reliving of a time when I was mistaken for the next Doogie Howser during college interviews.

I also underestimated her relationship with Tara, a good friend of mine who works at a restaurant that my mom and her friends frequent (by the way, Happy Birthday, Tara). Now, I am forced to be a man of my word, and so I begrudgingly post quite possibly the two most regrettable, unfortunate and laughable senior pictures in recent history.

So here they are, taken in the summer of 2002, when I was but a wee lad with a bowl cut (seriously?) and a dream. And a love for the A.C. Slater pose. I stood just 5'2" and only cracked a triple-digit weight after a heavy meal. I would like to thank the entirety of people who knew me in 2002 for not bothering to tell me just how ridiculous I looked. Come on people, a bowl cut after the year 1994. That could've been prevented. Sigh.

If it helps, please imagine the person in these photos uttering the following phrases:

• Hi, I'd like to apply for college.
• One student for "American Pie."
• Will you go to prom with me?
• I'll drive.

And yes, ladies. He's single.

Well played, mother and Tara. Never again shall I doubt either of you.

cheers. i guess.
.charlie