Now I Know Why It's Called SUPER Target.

When Super Target arrived in Lincoln last month, I was thrilled. Finally, a one-stop location where I could buy groceries, picture frames, movies, livestock, Lasik eye surgery, a puppy, my self-esteem and a girlfriend.

Never mind the fact that Lincoln had two perfectly good Target stores. And a couple Wal-Marts. And a Super Duper Wal-Mart or whatever it is when they put a Wal-Mart inside of a preexisting Wal-Mart. It was time for an upgrade. And in came Super Target, which has basically the same product offering as a Wal-Mart, but without the smell of urine and broken dreams. It's wonderful.

And so, I ventured to Super Target the other night. Intimidated? Believe it. But I was determined to explore, determined to find and purchase something I didn't even need. Because that's the Target Philosophy.

5 minutes into my shopping experience, I found this:

That's right. It's velcro-attaching hair extensions for your cat. A kitty weave. So that your cat may look like Pippi Longstocking, if you're into that sort of thing. Aside from giving me one more reason to despise people who are way too into their cats, this led me to the conclusion that Super Target was the greatest store ever. This is exactly what Lincoln has been waiting for. I don't think you could find an item of this quality at a feline specialty store (which if I owned, by the way, I would call Mad Catters. Because cat-crazy middle-aged women love puns. That's not my opinion, that's science). So thank God (or Dave Coulier) for Super Target. Because what's more American than unnecessary cat accessories?

Anyway, that was my Super Target experience. What was yours? Have you been? Did you get lost? Do you like that show LOST? I do. I love it, actually. Okay, I've obviously derailed.

cheers.
.charlie